Recent Posts

Katsumi had no choice but to go forward and quietly trudged through the water. Upon drawing nearer, her keen eyes caught in the dimly lit path ahead sen... wait. What the heck were those things?

"W... What in... the actual fuck???"

Did she accidentally consume opium in her last meal or something? Kat had heard about the effects of the drug and she became seriously concerned about her mental well-being right now.

Clenching her eyes tightly shut, she opened them and, at still seeing the turtle men, she slapped her cheeks a few times for good measure. Nope. Still there. Fuck.

Not really sure what exactly to do, Katsumi hid in the shadows and, focusing on her spirit, conjured up a gust of wind to quickly raise up the (presumably) light baby turtles and hit the weird guard-things in the head with them.

Worth a try with all of the weirdness going on, right?

Katsumi blinked at the question and looked over at Shou. Why was he asking her that? Was it simply out of curiosity? Was there something she said that made him want to know? The question itself didn't make her nervous. It was simply the fact that Katsumi didn't realize that it was unusual for someone as young as her to be so mature. She had been forced to be that way due to her upbringing, so she didn't really think about the fact that she didn't have a real childhood. Because, for someone who never had one and never was around others who had good childhoods, what was there to know to miss?

"Uh... sixteen. You?"

The man on the horse groaned in pain and Katsumi glanced backwards. He didn't seem to be in any real danger right now. The horse was going slowly and she had patched up the wounds. Of course, there was always a danger with the stomach, but only time would tell. She didn't try cleaning it out well though.

"Do not move and your wounds shouldn't get any worse. Understand?"

He simply nodded and Kat turned her head back around, looking forward. The woman listened to Shou and, if it weren't for the fact that she had never really developed a sense of humour because she hadn't been allowed to, Katsumi would have found what Shou said to be funny.

"You shouldn't worry too much about it. You are still young and that sort of thing... well... you learn it. I was kind of... forced to be that way since I was little..." her mouth would close and she would trail off. Katsumi disliked talking about herself, especially her past, and her gaze would drop to the ground, fingers nervously tugging at her hakama.

"There is no need to worry yourself about it, Yamabara-san. Shit just... happens," Katsumi said with a shrug. It had been a good horse, but what do you do? Life moved on no matter what happened. Kat learned that the hard way years ago. As much as she enjoyed horses and was a decent rider, she was just as fine traveling by foot. Kat found that she was just as easily able to find work without a steed. It simply took her longer to get to places, and she couldn't carry around as much. "It isn't so bad. As long as I can find jobs."

Katsumi seriously doubted this bounty was worth all of that much, but she nevertheless pursed her lips and pondered the possibility. "Hm... well... that would be rather... nice."

Being a realist though, Katsumi nodded and added, confidence within her voice about the matter, "With a few more good paying jobs along with this bounty, I think... I will finally be able to get that gelding. I... am pretty good with my money and have been saving up, so..."

It was nearly midnight, Katsumi wanting to use the darkness as a better cover. There was a total of seven guards at the front of the castle, and she needed to get inside to save the princess, or whatever the hell she was. Some rich guy's daughter. Whatever.

Going through the entrance was too risky, plus foolhardy. That wasn't Kat's style. There was a ladder that led up to the top of the wall, but there were too many sentries patrolling on the wall for her to take them all out without one noticing and then alerting the rest of the guards. That could potentially endanger the princess if they grew paranoid, and so Katsumi scratched that out. Which left the one guard at the waterways. She could take them out one by one after she already infiltrated the castle, disguising herself as a guard and picking them off one by one.

Drawing nearer, staying among the trees, Katsumi would eventually stop and kneel down. Taking careful aim, the archer would shoot at the sentry's head, wanting to immediately kill him so that he wouldn't make a peep that could potentially alert the others.

Rushing forward if she successfully killed the sentry, slipping through and blending with the shadows, Katsumi reached the castle wall, right at the waterways. Before slipping inside, the girl's brows furrowed and she stopped, peering down at the man. What in the actual fuck?

"Is that... a... mushroom?"

After a very long pause with her staring at the hat-thing in confusion, she would blink and slowly shake her head, before moving forward.

"Focus, Katsumi. Forget the weird mushroom thing. Yes."

Her logical mind was having a hard time coping with something so simple (yet odd.) She really hoped nothing else weird was inside... you so know that's an invitation for weird shit galore <3

Hidenori smiled and she could tell that he was happy to hear of this news. If only Haji were there and she could tell him, reunite the two brothers. She imagined the expression on Haji's face and it brought a smile within her dark hues.

"Yes, he... he really is," said Katsumi. Hidenori being Haji's own brother, she felt she could say more to him and splurged a little about herself, to help give him more insight about his beloved brother, "I... never really believed in goodness in people, but... well, he turned my thoughts around, to say the very least."

A familiar look shimmered within Hidenori's hues. Oh, she knew that emotion. Shame. Her brows knit and Kat bit down on her bottom lip as he stood up and looked away. Gaze falling down momentarily, she inhaled slowly and on the exhale went forward, dainty hand clasping his hand. Tugging, the woman would pull him so that he would face her and Kat peered up into Hidenori's face. Her expression was soft and, while there was not a smile tugging at the corners of her lips, there was a sympathetic and warm shimmer within her brown hues.

"I know him, Hidenori. Haji-kun... he wouldn't be anything but exuberant upon seeing one of his brothers. It has been so many years... I... I would take you to him... whenever you are ready. Or... Or him to you."

Yes. She just wanted to ensure Haji's happiness and to keep him cheerful. Doing that would bring her joy herself.

Hand slipping away from his, it would fall to her side as Hidenori took his blade and spoke again. The girl blinked and stared up at him. She thought that was already the plan, and yet... there seemed to be something new in his eyes. Like he was utterly determined to take her to Kenshin. As if she had to meet him, and this was beyond more of a curiosity thing and request on her part.

Katsumi nodded and took a step forward, giving a small bow at the end. "Of... Of course. It would be an honour, Hidenori."

(So this is going to be mostly dialogue because... yeah. You'll see. >.>;)

By this point, powers shouldn't have been too surprising for the woman, and yet she was taken a bit aback when a light appeared in the center of her chest. She was far too wary by nature to take anything like that without at least some nervousness. It moved and turned into... her?

Katsumi saw what seemed to be her doppelganger, and this immediately unsettled the girl, and she glanced about nervously. She didn't like this. Whatsoever. Seeing the other trials, Katsumi grew more and more fearful, and she swallowed roughly when it was her turn.

Inhaling slowly, Katsumi bit down on her bottom lip and stepped forward, and the phantom tilted her head and stared at Katsumi. There was a knowing in her eyes. At the exhale, Katsumi suddenly ran to the side, and focused and moved her hands. A gust of wind brought her up and Kat jumped, and she made her way away from the group of people, and the doppelganger did the same. Just to make it seem a bit more convincing and not like she was just trying to get away, Katsumi fired shots, none that would actually hit. The action was mirrored. After a couple of jumps and gliding, Katsumi stopped when she was further in the clearing, out of earshot. And, no surprise the other halted as well, and all fires stopped.

Kat stared at her mirror image and quirked her brows, expression serious. "So how are we supposed to do this? Fight?"

"Is that really what you want to do?" inquired the doppelganger, tilting her head.

"... No."

"I didn't think so. That's not really our style. It's not what needs to be done. Not for us."

Katsumi didn't say anything in response, simply staring at her phantom. There was a long silence and the mirror image sighed and looked back towards the others.
"Hiding per usual."

"So? Maybe some people will accept what I am, but... not everyone. There's too much danger being a woman."

The phantom rolled her eyes and turned back towards Katsumi, saying almost disapprovingly, "I'm you. You don't think I know that? But that's not really what the problem is. That's not what I'm talking about."

Kat's eyes narrowed a little, feeling a bit annoyed. What was this phantom going on about? With a small growl, Katsumi inquired, wanting the doppelganger to get to the point already, "What are you talking about then?"

Brows arching up, she went on to say, "Oh, I think you know."

The irritation only grew and her hand on the bow tightened. "How about... you freaking enlighten me already? Isn't that the whole point of this exercise?"

Her expression told the image to just do her job already, and the phantom's expression grew somber. With a sigh, it said, "You're hiding from yourself."

Now it was time for Kat to roll her eyes and she took a step back, turning away from the phantom. She scoffed, "Please."

"No. You are," the phantom snapped, stepping forward. Her eyes narrowed and she said like a sharp jab, "After all of that talk with Haji-kun and you are still bullshitting yourself. Each and every day. It's fucking pathetic."

Katsumi felt the jab and whipped her head around to glare angrily at the phantom. She hissed, "Shut the hell up."

"All you do is lie, lie, lie."

"Stop it."

"Your physical scars cannot even compare to the internal ones. Could you be any more fucking damaged?"

Katsumi had had enough. Screw this trial. Screw this phantom and everything it was saying. Katsumi was done with this bullshit. She didn't need to hear it. Turning around, the woman brought her hand up and began to storm away. "I don't... I don't fucking need this shit."

Before she could walk forward even ten feet, the doppelganger used their musou to force Katsumi back, catching her in a whirlwind and whipping her backwards. Katsumi fell roughly onto the ground and rolled, and her hands clenched tightly into fists. Jumping up and shaking the snow out of her hair, Kat glared and, firing a single shot off, she seethed, "Fuck off!"

The phantom dodged the arrow with ease and quickly moved forward with a gust of wind, shoving Kat back and tossing the bow aside. Katsumi was about ready to get the bow back with wind, but the doppelganger made it go further away. The archer stomped forward towards the phantom, getting in her face and growling loudly, "WHAT?!"

The other's eyes were dark and she said considerably more calmly in comparison to Kat's exclamation, "You aren't getting off that easily."

Kat's anger and the doppelganger not wanting Katsumi to leave, there was suddenly a whirlwind trapping them together. The archer simply glared angrily at the phantom, breathing heavily, breath shaky. The glistening in her eyes was telling the phantom to go on already.

Staring hardly at Katsumi, she went on to say, "Have you really accepted yourself? For everything you have done?"

Clenching her fists, Katsumi turned her head and spat back, snow and wind whirling around the two of them, "What the hell are you talking about?"

The phantom's eyes narrowed. "You know exactly what the fuck I'm talking about. Killing good ol' Father. Oh, you did what you had to for us, finally taking out that son of a bitch and getting away from it all, and yet... and yet you still can't be happy."

Katsumi's brows furrowed and she shook her head. No, that wasn't true. She was happy. Of course she was! Kat had Haji, she had friends. Maybe she didn't show it conventionally, but... but she really was joyful. For the first time in her life. Right...?

"I am too happy!”

Again, the phantom rolled her eyes. “You're not really happy, because you won't let us be. Because you can't get past the fact that we were never loved from the start. That ever since we were born, Father hated us. That no matter how hard you tried, that never changed. He never accepted us, even at the end when you... you proved stronger than him. And so you hate yourself. Nothing you do is ever good enough, and it will never be."

Kat's bottom lip trembled and she stumbled back, whimpering. Everything hit so close to home and tore straight through her soul. It was so horrible to hear, so hard, and tears fell down her cool cheeks. She didn't even have a response, and the phantom rolled her eyes and scoffed, "Pff. Pathetic, per usual."

No, Katsumi couldn't hear this. She simply couldn't bear it. Shaking her head and hands raising up, gripping at her hair, the archer muttered, voice slowly getting louder, "Shutupshutupshutup stop talking!"

But the phantom didn't stop. No, she kept going, grinding the truth right into Kat. "Father... Father will never be dead because you keep him alive with all of your self-loathing."

Katsumi whimpered at the last word, flinching, and whispered, shaking her head more slowly now, taking another small step back, "Wha... no, I... I don-"

"You can't lie to me... us. You took him out and yet he still controls you and everything you do. Father hated us because of what we are, that we weren't the son he wanted because of mother dying. We weren't worth her life because we are a woman. And you share his own hatred for us because of that. Even with everyone else coming into our lives now, you still hate yourself... us."

Kat's voice grew quieter and the woman felt as though she was shrinking down, breaking. "N... No... I... I don't..."

The phantom seemed to only get bigger and more intimidating. It took another step forward, closing in. "You don't appreciate them because can't appreciate yourself. You still let Father run your life. Every single thing you do, every part of who you are, is still controlled by him."

"But.... But I have Haji. I.... I h-have friends."

"You still hide yourself."

"Because... Because I have to!" exclaimed the woman, trying to clutch that thin thread to save her from tumbling into an abyss of despair. But the phantom brushed it aside and had Katsumi continue to fall.

"Because you hate yourself," said the phantom. Going right up to Katsumi, her face was within inches of Kat's. Her eyes stared impassively at Katsumi, coldly. "You may as well be dead. You are an empty husk of a person. Who even are you? Are you Katsumi or Hiroshi?"

The archer's eyes widened and she swallowed hardly. "Wha... I... I'm Katsu-"

"Who even is Katsumi?" interrupted the doppelganger. When Katsumi peered up and matched the phantom's gaze, more tears slipping down cheeks, she continued, "No. You aren't Katsumi. You just act like the boy Daddy wanted us to be, but you can't even do that right. ... Scum."

And that was a direct shot into the heart, and it shattered, crumbling into tiny pieces. Kat's throat tightened and the core of her chest ached terribly with a sharp pain, stomach twisting and churning. Clenching her eyes shut, Katsumi screamed, face wet with tears, "STOP IT! STOP! SHUT THE HELL UP!"

The doppelganger stared down at Katsumi with an incriminating expression. "None of the others mean shit because you'll never let anybody in. Not fully. Because you can't even bear to look at yourself. Because you hate yourself."

Katsumi kept whispered the word no, breathing that it wasn't true, and the phantom stepped closer, leaning in and saying softly in Kat's ear, "You'll never amount to anything because you can't even amount to yourself."

She couldn't stand anymore, crying out in agonizing pain, and Katsumi dropped to her knees. Crying turned into weeping, and grew more intense. Never had Katsumi felt so overwhelmed with grief, and being dead inside would have been preferable right then. Nothing had ever been so painful in her entire life. Katsumi hunched over and hid her face, tears slipping through her fingers.

The phantom simply stood there, staring down at Katsumi as she cried and cried, and she wasn't sure how much time had passed, whirlwind only growing stronger. Katsumi didn't want to keep going, wanted to die right there, and she leaned forward enough to wear the hands on her face touched the snow-covered ground. It was a struggle to breathe and Katsumi gasped and wept.

"Just... Just k-kill me... please..."

The phantom's eyes narrowed and it sighed, removing its own bow. Stepping forward, mirror Katsumi took aim at Kat's head, as she whimpered. Oh, how she wanted to die after working so hard to survive, to finally just quit but... Haji came to mind. What would he do if she died here? She was his reason for fighting and working on getting stronger, and... that night came to mind and Kat swallowed. Hadn't she said he was basically her reason to keep living now that she wasn't alone? That now she didn't just survive for survival's sake?

Katsumi... she couldn't just die now. Despite all of this pain, there was a reason to keep going. Multiple reasons, and it had all been said that night and on others with her lover. Everything the phantom said... it was wrong. Maybe it was once right, but it held no truth anymore. She wouldn't let it.

Hand raising up, Katsumi gripped the bow. "No..."

Slowly bringing herself up, Katsumi sniffled and sat up. Her eyes were red, but she stared right at the phantom. Taking a deep, shaky breath, she went, "I may... I may not know who I am, but.... but I'm finding myself. I will find myself, and I will be happy. I... I am happy. I... I have Haji and I have my friends, and Father... that son of a bitch is gone."

Swallowing, Kat's brows knit and she bit down on her bottom lip before exclaiming, vigor in her dark eyes again, after only moments before holding death, praying for it, "Father was wrong! I... I am worth something. I shouldn't... I shouldn't hate myself. Life is more than just surviving. I am loved, and... and I deserve it. I'm not scum or simply some burden. I matter, and... and I'll be damned if anyone tries to say otherwise!"

At the end, Katsumi's fist pounded onto the ground and, while physically below the phantom as she knelt down, her spirit, her heart was soaring far above. There was no wavering or uncertainty. Katsumi meant every word and she stared right into phantom Katsumi's eyes. And, after several moments passed, a smile spread across the doppelganger's lips.

"Then start acting like it."

Kat's eyes widened sharply and her head jerked back a bit in surprise. That was not what Katsumi expected to hear whatsoever, and she was entirely dumbfounded. The phantom figure proceeded to kneel down to get at Kat's level and cupped her cheek. Her smile only grew wider and her thumb stroked Kat's flesh, tilting her head as she gazed at Katsumi.

"Finally accept yourself and stop hiding, Katsumi."

The phantom stood up and stepped back, beginning to fade, and just before she disappeared, mirror Katsumi said softly whilst beaming, "Smile."

And then the doppelganger disappeared and the whirlwind entirely stopped, snow falling onto the ground and on Katsumi. Her gaze fell to the ground, searching, and she blinked back the tears. Raising up a hand, the woman wiped the remaining tears off of her face.

The physical appearance wasn't the real lie. Not the damaging or important one. All along Katsumi had been lying to herself, hating herself when she had no reason to do so. Katsumi said she was happy but held onto so many of the negative feelings from her Father and, consequently, her own self, that she couldn't quite be there as she should have been. But Kat pretended like she was, lying to herself and others that she cared about. She needed to be honest with herself and, most of all, finally truly accept and love herself. While maybe she wasn't one-hundred percent there, Katsumi at least recognized it now and was well on her way. Maybe soon, she would be able to smile like the phantom had, so brightly and filled with warmth.

A few tears slipping down, the corners of her lips twitched and there was a small smile there. It was faint, but it was still there and quite genuine. She wanted to see Haji. She wanted to say that she was finally ready to be happy. Really, truly happy. For it to be beyond simple words. That she could finally accept herself.

Katsumi stood up and brushed off the snow on her petite figure. Wiping away at the tears, the woman headed back towards the group, resolution clear within her shimmering, glassy hues. And it remained as she merged back with the main group, an unfamiliar and rare confidence radiating from her.

While it had been a bumpy ride and she nearly died, both in the inside and physically, Katsumi passed, and she couldn't have been more pleased. Looking over at Kenshin, her eyes smiled at him and her respect for the God of War only proved to skyrocket. She may have been a merc, but... Kat felt that she could serve this man and fight for him.

At Takehiro's comment, a beet-red blush coloured Katsumi's cheeks and when she inhaled and exhaled sharply from the embarrassment there was a very strong and sudden gust of wind aimed towards Takehiro. Sand would fly up at him, along with embers from the fire, and the wind very well may have been able to cause him to topple over. She didn't really do it intentionally though. It was simply that her musou went a little out of control from her strong emotions.

Man, was she embarrassed!

Gulping, Katsumi went on to say with a stammer, "W-What's that s-supposed to mean?!"

Shaking her head, she would turn to Jina after that thing with Tak, and say, "Uh, H... Hiroshi. Saito Hiroshi."

Remembering Jina's words from earlier, Katsumi shifted in her seat on the ground beside Haji and added, "Oh, and... as for jumping... I can help you, Jina-san. Did... you buy a horse more recently? In the morning, we could ride, if you like."

Katsumi woke up slowly from hearing footsteps, inhaling as she turned her head weakly. She forced her eyes open, vision going in and out, and the girl groaned, shifting. It felt like something was on top of her... blankets. And when Kat tried to move, there was sharp pain all along the entirety of her body. Everything hurt terribly. Katsumi winced and turned her head as much as she was able, and saw that she was someplace unfamiliar. Upon looking down, she also saw that she was bandaged. Her brows furrowed deeply and Katsumi muttered, "W... What happened?"

There was someone within the room and she turned around, and Kat looked over at her. While it was surprising to see her, Katsumi didn't really feel threatened. Simply confused. And the older woman could see that and sighed, shaking her head, hands soaking a cloth in water.

"You and that poor boy went through hell. If you hadn't have been found when you were, you two very well could be dead."

With those words, the events resurfaced and there was a flood of memories of what happened to her. Yet that didn't concern her as much as what happened to Haji. She had gone through hell again and again throughout her whole life. She could recover. It was more of physical wounds at this point that she needed to heal from right now, especially with her releasing all of her rage with killing the man who had abused her (and, in turn, her father once again.) But Haji... he had been forced to kill those men, and Katsumi knew it had to be ripping away at him. He was so good and kindhearted. Haji wasn't a killer. Not like her. Because of her, he had to go back on everything he stood for and believed in, and Katsumi felt immensely guilty.

"Oh, Haji-kun..." Tears welled within Kat's eyes and her bottom lip trembled. The girl whispered softly, "I'm so sorry..."

She tried to sit up, needing to see and talk to Haji, to comfort him and be there for him, but her body screamed. Katsumi only made it up a few inches. Everything hurt and she felt utterly exhausted and worn out, and Kat fell on her back, groaning.

"Don't get up, honey. It's going to take a while to heal from all of those wounds. You need to rest and bring down that fever before even thinking about just sitting up."

Katsumi was a bit concerned that the woman knew her gender, yet... what was she to do? It wasn't as though the woman knew of her false identity or anything, and she was taking care of her. That much was clear, especially when the older woman walked over to Kat and put a cool cloth on her forehead. At this point, Kat was just grateful she was alive.

Biting down on her lower lip, Katsumi asked concernedly as her face was wiped off, "The man... the one who was with me... is he... is he alri-"

"He's fine. He suffered a stab wound to the stomach, but he'll be okay. You're the one I'm more worried about, so you just rest up now."

Katsumi sighed in relief and nodded her head. "T... Thank you."

The woman nodded and smiled in response, standing back up and walking away. Despite all of that, Katsumi couldn't help but worry about her Haji, and she requested before the older woman could leave, likely to bring back more supplies or something along those lines, "Ma'am, if... if it isn't t-too much trouble... would.... would you mind... telling Haji-kun that I'm awake? That I'm okay? And... that.... that I'm sorry?"

She turned around and looked at Kat, before closing eyes and sighing. The older woman knew what it was to love someone, and could sense that in both Katsumi and Haji, sense the genuine concern. Plus, Katsumi did ask quite nicely. "Of course, dear."

"Thank you," she said again, and the older woman left. Kat stared up at the ceiling, thinking of Haji and hoping he'd get the message soon. If only she could be right there with him...

Katsumi just couldn't keep her eyes open anymore, and they fluttered closed. It was too much effort to keep them open. As she was falling into unconsciousness, Katsumi heard Haji's voice. It seemed distant and filled with despair, and she so desperately wanted to fix it, to alleviate what he was feeling and tell him that everything was okay. Katsumi wanted to tell Haji that she would be alright and that there was nothing to be worried about. She wanted to make things better. Yet... she couldn't right now. She was so tired, and a tear slipped past her cheek, blood smeared across and hair matted against pallid flesh.

Her fingers on his chest tightened before going slack as she passed out, and soon after Haji did as well. Fortunately for them, a group of villagers found them and the two were taken to the inn, and their injuries were tended to.

Together, they barely escaped death and survived from the ordeal. The physical injuries would heal in time, but the emotional toll would take much, much longer, especially for Kat's Haji...

(End scene)